A veil of mystery, A shadow of uncertainty, A torrent of doubts, Shattered dreams and broken hearts, And yet Rush of feelings, Bonds of love, Ties of affection, Ah-life!
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Friday, 23 October 2015
Sunday, 7 June 2015
Wings!
“I have come to accept the feeling of not knowing where I am going. And I
have trained myself to love it. Because it is only when we are
suspended in mid-air with no landing in sight, that we force our wings
to unravel and alas begin our flight. And as we fly, we still may not
know where we are going to. But the miracle is in the unfolding of the
wings. You may not know where you're going, but you know that so long as
you spread your wings, the winds will carry you.”
― C. JoyBell C.
― C. JoyBell C.
Friday, 22 May 2015
Thoughts Unbound!!!
They say I am too bold,
I am not supposed to speak my mind.
I am not supposed to speak my mind.
They tell me not to let thoughts astray.
But my mind is unbound.
I consider it a blessing,
They call it a curse...!
I think of flying,
They chain me down.
I talk about freedom,
They teach about bounds!
I think about airing my thoughts,
I consider it a blessing,
They call it a curse...!
I think of flying,
They chain me down.
I talk about freedom,
They teach about bounds!
I think about airing my thoughts,
They shutter down the windows of my mind!
I ask them to let me escape,
They tell me its not allowed.
They tell me its not allowed.
Oh! lord of the world,
What is wrong with them?
You never created them with bounds,
What is wrong with them?
You never created them with bounds,
you never shuttered their brains down.
Then why are they,
A burden unto themselves???
Then why are they,
A burden unto themselves???
-Aksa
Wednesday, 20 May 2015
Saturday, 16 May 2015
Volcanic!!!
Some days,
Explosions occur.
When all the scorching hot suns I’ve swallowed suddenly begin
to erupt into fiery volcanoes of primal rage and crystallized sadness, leaving
behind the scorched remains of worn out flesh and feelings flooding my hollow
gut.
Some days, in the book of life, are
Just marked worse than others.
Labels:
anger,
bad days,
disturbed soul,
feelings,
LIFE,
madness,
rage,
sadness,
silent explosions,
volcanic
Sunday, 10 May 2015
Angel In Disguise!
The window glass was frosted and a three inch thick layer of
snow covered the street outside, and still more was falling when I received a
phone call from my motherland. My mother’s heart transplant surgery was scheduled
for tomorrow and I needed to send the money home. That money was the reason I
was away from her at this crucial time. Deciding not to take any chances of
late delivery, I exited my dilapidated apartment and braced the storm outside
at this ungodly hour. But the night had something else in store for me. As I
turned the street corner I was busted by some thugs. I refused to hand over the
money and hence got beaten near to death.
Delivering a final kick to my ribs with their heavy snow covered boots,
they ended my torture and walked away with the money. Leaving me to die in the
middle of the snow covered street. Try as hard as I might I could not get up
and as the minutes passed the numbing cold started to seep in through my torn
clothing, it clogged the wounds stopping the bleeding and making me numb to the
pain. But the thought that I had failed my mother was most painful and could
not be numbed. Soon the hypothermia began to set in and I could feel the
pricking needles of the harsh air in my throat as breathing became an ordeal! The
thought of my mother was not allowing me to lose consciousness but I knew that
my death was eminent as no one will wander out in this snow storm in the middle
of the night.
All
sense of time was lost to me and I did not know how long had passed when a pair
of brown boots approached me. At first I thought it was another merciless
street wanderer come to salvage whatever he could. But then I thought I was
hallucinating, when a wrinkled old face entered my vision and a gnarled hand
grabbed my wrist to check if I had some life left in me. The figure got up and
started heading back the way it had come. I did not mind her leaving me because
I could see that she was a crippled old lady hardly able to support herself
with a staff. She could not have possibly been able to help me even if she
wanted to.
My eyes were
starting to close when I saw the stooped shadowy figure returning. She was
having difficulty carrying the bundle of blankets in her arm. She tilted precariously
on her staff as a flurry of snow rushed past her. Upon reaching me she threw
the bundle down on the snow and started unrolling it with trembling hands. She draped
the blankets over me, opened a warm water bottle and cleaned my clogged wounds.
The freezing storm was making it difficult for her to move and even to breathe
but she ignored her discomfort and kept up her efforts to revive my unmoving
body. And I remember thinking that she was an angel in disguise sent from the
heaven above but then I thought the heavens would not want me because I was
unable to save my mother’s life a and it will remain my biggest regret.
The distant
sirens told me that she must have called an ambulance. Soon the paramedics
surrounded me and gave me injections for controlling hypothermia. As I started
to get some feeling back into my body they carried me to the ambulance. When they
were carrying me to the ambulance I grabbed hold of the gnarled wrinkled hand
and asked; “Why?”
A soft trembling voice replied; “because I AM A MOTHER”
And I realized that the love of a mother is
universal knowing no bounds and my own mother would also have willingly embraced
death a thousand more times to save my life!
Friday, 8 May 2015
CHAOS...!!!
Labels:
Born Insanes,
Chaos,
death,
dreamer,
games of destiny,
LIFE,
madness,
nostalgia
Thursday, 7 May 2015
Moments that Count!
The most frightening thing of all is that feelings aren't fixed nor explainable!
You can be everything one moment,
and just enough another,
and nothing at all the next.
and you wouldn't even know how to explain those moments!
Aksa!
You can be everything one moment,
and just enough another,
and nothing at all the next.
and you wouldn't even know how to explain those moments!
Aksa!
Saturday, 2 May 2015
"The perfect blend"
When I retreat into the dark recesses of my mind,
I find myself in a complexly woven web of thoughts and emotions, both conscious
and unconscious. Though it is dark in there but I can still see streaks of
brilliant white threads interwoven into the delicate web. The oppressing
darkness tries to hide the light in its veil but the brilliance still shines
through infusing me with the determination to keep on following to the core- as
if I were on a scavenger hunt- in hopes that I might find my true self
somewhere in the middle of the tangled
white threads. But at a certain point in the hunt I realize that I am
not all goodness personified, so perhaps I have a better chance of finding
myself in the dark shadowy parts of the web. But then again I am not completely
lost to the darkness, therefore I keep carving my path to the core where the
light and the darkness merge and none can be separated from the other because
that is what the essence of my character is, a smooth blend of right and wrong,
good and bad. I have my flaws and yet I am not completely faulted! I still
retain my good qualities and the bad ones help me maintain the balance. The
natural balance which is the most fundamental thing in keeping the universe in
order. And this is the order that I find at the core of my dark mind web. It is
the order from which all the chaos emerges. The chaos that we call life…!!!
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